I last wrote to you in October of 2010 when I decided to make a Commitment to Purity. I didn't know what that would look like, and I definitely messed up many times before 2010 ended. Since then, I have spoken to some mighty women of God who I admire highly. And they told me about a fast that I am so glad to now be pursuing. I am currently taking a 6-month fast. A fast from dating. A fast from being in romantic relationships.
For background on why I am deciding to do this... Well, meet my 15 year old self. Something tragic happened to someone I love when they were 15 years old. By the time my 15th birthday hit, I was terrified of something bad happening to me when I turned 15. And I subconsciously did everything I could to not be hurt in that way.
The main way I tried to prevent bad things from happening was by being in relationships. I think I can honestly say that I have not been completely single since I was 15 years old. I have either been in a relationship, talking to someone, dating someone, or just emotional attached to someone for the last 8 years. I don't even really know what it means to be a single, Christian woman. And I also realized that I didn't really know what it meant to be in a REAL relationship with God. We all say it, "I'm not religious, I'm in a relationship!" But I didn't know what that meant. Now I want to know. And so now I am committing the next 6 months to finding that out.
You ask me how I intend to do this? The fast that my friends told me about was based on a book called "Your Knight in Shining Armor" By P.B. Wilson. I ordered it as soon as I could and I finally started reading it this past Sunday. The book is short, so I know I will finish it quickly. After that, I plan to pursue God aggressively.
- Spending daily quiet times with God
- Reading my Bible on a daily basis (actually studying it for understanding)
- Reading other Christian literature that will help me to understand my relationship with Christ better
- Spending time with other people who love God and who want to help me on my journey.
So for the next 6 months, I am SUPER single... to put it better, I am married to God. Am I a little nervous about this decision? Hecks yeah! A LOT can happen in 6 months. I am excited about it now, what if I am not by the time February ends?!? What will I do then? I guess we all will see huh?
I am currently on Day 6 of my fast. If I don't write about this journey, I'm scared I will forget everything that God shows me. So (now that my computer is back in order) I will be writing now as much as possible. Chronicling. I like the sound of that. This is my Honeymoon period with God. I don't want to forget a moment of it.
If you're a praying person. Pray for me. If you're skeptical about this whole "fast thing," I'm glad. I'm skeptical too. But all I have heard were amazing results, so I am giving it a shot. Maybe from my fast, you will want to try it too.
Until next time,
~K~
